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Firstly expect them to respond with surprise anger and disgust because they no longer have control over you. This they will NOT like. Hopefully you are now in a place where u do not need the approval of your family or children. If not please get therapeutic support to bring you to this place.

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From my experience in my work most clients who were unsure and stayed in the relationship because of their partner's insistence regretted their decision.

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There is no reasoning with such a person. Cut off all contact immediately as discretely as you can. Phone, emails etc. Don't allow threats of suicide stop you from breaking contact as this is quite typical. You have no control over what they choose to do so let go.

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I have worked with this. It is complex. I wonder is there some role model in their lives they are copying. Or could they also can be in inheriting the habits of a parent, grandparent or peers perhaps less contact with this influence might be helpful. Express your feelings about their behaviour starting with ‘I' NOT ‘you' I.e. I feel uncomfortable or I feel hurt/sad/disappointed when…

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