Quora Blog Responses

What advice would you give to a child who is the scapegoat for a narcissistic parent?

Knowledge is the key. I wish I had understood and could put a name on the dynamics of narcissism growing up as a kid. I was lost and confused and my innerself was destabalised.

This child is likely to be gaslighted and I recommend that she watches Lisa A Romano's short simple podcast on the subject.

It will give her iideas on how she can protect herself from this abuse and not dump on herself or be destabilised in any way

Another very helpful resource is ACOA"s laundry list. This will validate her experiences. There is also a second laundry list on how how she will have improved as she works on herself

If she cannot afford a therapist that understands these dynamics there are support groups for young people like Alanon which will be a great help because the narcissistic parent is behaving like a dry drunk.

Finally she could tell a counselor or teacher she trusts in school what is happening. Exposing the narcissist is their greatest fear.


I found your insight helpful. It brought new awareness to me as a therapist. It helped in identifying that my client had ADHD which allowed me to alter how I worked with him. To slow the work down, to not get frustrated and to help him understand himself. I am more aware of the signs and inde...

Carol , Supervisee Re: her client
Oct 15, 2018

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