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Lately, my dad has been punching holes in the walls of our house. My mom wants to get the walls fixed, but we need an excuse other than "Our dad punched the walls.” What can be some good excuse?

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So you are following the family rule in keeping your Dad's unacceptable behaviour a secret.

This is not helpful to the wellbeing of your father, your mother and most importantly yourself. Due to your childhood conditioning you are unconsciously normalising unwell behaviour which is likely to get worse.

It's essential to break family patterns and tell the truth about what is going on.

If you are young contact please reach out to a youth support service to get help in dealing with this.

I also urge you to get therapeutic support to enable you to understand what's not normal. This is work many of us had to do and learn.

This action will help you to see another way of moving forward. Breaking secrets and behaviours like this will be such a gift to yourself and your family for generations to come.


When I came to Margaret first I was lost, confused and depressed. I scored myself 1/10. I am able to cope so much better now that I had therapy that helped me understand my ADHD which I feel I have struggled with all my life. This lead to severe bullying inside and outside school. I left scho...

Stephen, 56, ADHD Client
Oct 15, 2018

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